Woman

What is it about men that make a woman alone seem worthless? 

How can our fathers advocate for independence yet society shows us dependence on one is the fortress,

the security,

the goal of one’s life,

To find a man who loves, cares, cherishes, and holds us tight.

To find a man who keeps us grounded and that one person who makes us want to be better, 

but we seem to have lost the idea of that man’s sole competitor.

The self.

The woman.

The strong, intelligent, beautiful, I-don’t-need-a-man-to-get-by wonderful woman.

From a young age we are taught that a woman needs a man.

Consciously,
subconsciously,
subliminally we are told that what is necessary is right 

and what is right is to be a wife.

Fairy tales abundant of women finding men, 

the idea of a single, unmarried parent looked down on again and again.

Like women couldn’t survive without that Y-chromosome, and trying?

That can’t be right - we shouldn’t be alone.

Because somewhere in the course of all of our years, 

we interpreted what we then turned into a fear:

that being alone is not the way and it shouldn’t be done,

so we long for the companion, the other half, the one.

And by doing this we’ve caused interruption in our lives.

Our personal goals, dreams and ambitions set aside.

Because what’s more important than doing what you love?

It’s finding it instead,

so we search high and low.

Society has emphasized to us what is right.

We know what we’ve been shown,

but our fathers taught us differently – and because of that, we should have known.

Known to disregard the messages that we interpret to be so right,

and to get the idea of a man,

a husband,

a soul mate,

out of the center of our sight.

Because a man is not most important and should not be seen as such,

so this message is for those women, who worry too much,

the women who wonder if they’ll ever be enough,

the women who think human nature is calling,

that their clock is ticking, so they’re at home balling,

over a man who is in their life now,

one who once was, or will be,

Oh when will that time be?

I say to you, don’t worry.

Because contrary to the messages we we’re fed,

the lies that were spread,

the words we interpreted and filed away in our heads.

You don’t need a man.

You don’t need the one.

Because in this life, you’ll do much greater things than find a man,
you’re a strong, intelligent, beautiful, wonderful woman.  

90 Days in Tamarindo: Day 35

Thirty five days. It's been thirty five days since we stepped off American soil and embarked on a mission to learn more about ourselves, become immersed in another culture, explore other parts of our vastly unexplored world and let go of the things we were holding onto at home that needed to be let go of. Thirty five days.

In thirty five days you can build a deck in front of your house. You can learn new dance styles and perform them with ease. You can perfect the angle of your shot to perfectly hit your paintball opponent square in the chest during the final round of a four on four match. In thirty five days we have learned that making friends is as easy as asking someone where they are from. We have learned that sometimes people don't follow through with promises. We have learned that judging a book by its cover can mean a missed opportunity. And most importantly, we have learned that no matter the circumstance, you can change an entire situation by simply controlling the way you respond to it. 

Our 90 days in Tamarindo have effectively been changed to 60 days in Tamarindo. After careful deliberation and many a discussion on the topic, we have decided to return to The States a month early. We are neither upset nor ashamed of the decision but thankful to have had the experiences we have thus far and excited to make the most of the rest of our time here. 

Since the last update, we have continued our pattern of adventuring when we aren't working and making friends along the way. We traveled by private shuttle, with quite possibly the coolest driver yet who challenged my Spanish skills by only knowing a few words in English, to the small town of Montezuma, Costa Rica. It was in this small town at a bar that we made new friends simply by sharing in the frustration of the complete lack of respect some people have. Nothing like a little bit of shared hatred to bring people together, huh? We spent nearly the rest of our time in Montezuma with them, hiking up mountains, jumping off waterfalls, enjoying a dinner that took far too long to make and took far too much of our money, enjoying coffee and breakfast by the ocean, and sharing stories of our lives at home that are quite different being lived on opposite sides of the same country. We convinced our new friends to take a chance and we shared our shuttle back to Tamarindo with them and brought them to our hostel. What can we say? You make friends fast when you're the only people who speak fluent American English in town with two streets. 

When we returned to our hostel in Tamarindo we started planning the next adventure: kayaking up the river to the estuary in hopes of seeing crocodiles, monkeys, and the local birds. Initially, Krysti was scared. She had this ridiculous fear that she'd be eaten by a crocodile and not live to tell the story. Clearly, we were not eaten and we are alive and well to tell the story of how uneventful and crocodile-less this kayak trip was. It was slightly disappointing since I was GoPro-ready to see some beady eyes in the distance. The most we got was the sight of some tracks and crocodile-tail-whipped river banks. Still cool, but much less cool than an actual croc! 

The way back was terrible. We were kayaking against the wind and the current. I thought I had dead arms from working out, or wrestling with my sisters, but those arms don't compare to the dead arms we got from kayaking back through the current. I was highly frustrated. I was quickly becoming upset and hoping and wishing for one of the passing boats to see the frustration on my face and offer to tow us in. Can you guess what didn't happen? I bet you can. I guess it's much more of an accomplishment if its hard, though, so in retrospect I suppose I'm just a bad ass. Yep. That is what I am going with. End of story.

It is with a sad heart that I report we have yet to do anything exciting since the crocodile-less adventure, other than plan our next adventure.  

In the coming weeks we will be venturing to Monte Verde and La Fortuna to see Volcano Arenal, walk across some rickety bridges, soak in the natural hot springs and natural hot river, zip line through the canopy of trees and take in the scenery of an area of opposite climate than we are use to in Tamarindo. After that we will head to  Tortuguera and hopefully see some turtles while we snorkel in the crystal clear waters off the Caribbean coast of Costa Rica. I suppose a little down time is ok while we await these next adventures! :)

90 Days in Tamarindo: Day 20

Twenty days into the adventure already? I can hardly believe it. The concept of time feels different here than it does at home. Some days feel like we have been here forever and other days feel like we just arrived. I guess that's the interesting thing about time - you create it yourself. It's a man-made phenomena. Humans are the only species who think of a day as 24 hours and think of all things in relation to time. When we rid ourselves of this concept, our days escape us and the only notion of time we have left is the rising and setting of the sun we adventure under.

With the sun as our time keeper, we have been collecting adventures like seashells in a bag. One by one. Perfectly glossed and imperfectly flawed. Some adventures were everything we expected and others required some tender love and care. But all of them are worth looking back on.

On Saturday morning we packed a few snacks and some bottles of water and headed to the beach. Kayaking was the agenda for the day. We talked to one vendor who didn't have what we needed. He walked us to a shop that did. Two kayaks - a double and a single. Perfect for the three of us and our things. We haggled a bit, he threw in three sets of snorkel gear and we were off. We swerved through the boats anchored in the harbor and were on our way to the island covered in shells, and boy was it covered! Conch shells, all broken into smaller, spiral-looking pieces covered the island like a blanket. Walking on them almost felt wrong, like we were stepping on something sacred.

After we explored the island a bit and picked some shells to bring back home, we grabbed the snorkel gear and made our way into the water. The current was so strong we could literally just float in the water with our heads looking down and let the waves move us along. A snorkel tour in neutral, if you will. We saw bright blue fish, yellow striped fish, and schools of average looking, less exciting fish. Then it happened. After exploring a large area and gaping at the underwater clarity, we heard a gargle-muffled shriek. Niesha came above water, took the mouthpiece out and said, "I saw something cool and want to tell you, but I also kind of want to get out of the water. It's a sea snake."


Krysti and I looked at each other, then under the water and immediately pulled our feet to our chest, wading high above the ground and laughing at our fear. After looking for a few minutes, we didn't see the snake so we carried on with our exploration. It took about two minutes and BAM. Right in front of our faces was a fairly long, bright red and yellow sea snake. And instead of gaping at its awesomeness, we shrieked, choked on sea water and thrashed our arms and legs as if this thing was already attacking us. haha (Can you picture this?) As I am sure you can guess, we exited the water immediately and prepared for our trek back to the mainland. Like I said - an adventure that required some tender love and care, but one that we surely won't forget.

Other than our kayaking and snorkeling day, we have been pretty relaxed. We found a quaint little coffee shop we like with all hand-made, wood furniture and delicious cappuccinos. We found a restaurant with (so far) the best guacamole, salsa and chips in town. We have ventured to the quirky book store a handful of times to talk to Jim and read the books we picked out. While I am in the middle of two books on my Kindle App, I am currently reading the hard back version of Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn. I am hooked. Between working at the hostel, completing my remote assignments for the agency at home and exploring, it seems like I am doing a pretty good job at setting aside some time to read and relax. When we finish the books, we can return them for half the price we bought them for in store credit for a new one. Pretty good system if you ask me. A few days ago we took our books (or sketch book in Niesha's case) to a new coffee shop, Cafe Tico. This coffee shop is all outdoor seating under a gazebo, which boasted perfect front row seats for the thunder storm that rolled in on our way. We enjoyed fresh fruit smoothies, listened to the thunder storm, read our books and sketched for two hours. It was a perfect way to spend our break. I have a feeling we will be back again soon. 

Today, after watching the beachside fireworks, we are heading to the Crazy Monkey for some dancing.  It won't be too late of a night, since our shuttle to Montezuma leaves at 7am. For Krysti's birthday we are headed to an even smaller town in Costa Rica for a weekend of relaxation and waterfall jumping! Photos, videos and a new blog to come, of course! 

Ps. Twenty days in and I have already added a nicely bronzed, sunscreen-protected layer to my skin. SCORE! Living la Pura Vida here, as we should be! :)

Let go.

I am telling myself that today will be the day I release from my mind, the poisonous things from my past that have undoubtably been making a home for the past year, imprisoning my will to live a life free of resentment and hatred. The deceitful trickery my mind has been duped with, trusting and believing my soul was free from malicious thoughts and feelings, will cease to exist, if and only if a valiant effort is made to free my mind of acrimony and focus on the positivity in my future.

90 Days in Tamarindo: Day 10

Here we are, ten days later, and we are starting to figure things out. We know the location of the businesses that we like to visit, which is a huge feat since there are no such things as addresses here; we know that when you are this close to the equator, one application of sunscreen isn't enough for an hour; we know that surfing can give you more bruises than kickboxing; and we know that even after multiple attempts with the broom, sweeping will never get rid of the sand in this hostel. 

It has been a wonderfully fun-filled ten days in Tamarindo. We attended Karaoke night at Sharky's (the most popular bar in Tamarindo) and we plan to return tonight for another round of song and dance. We partook in the national drink (Cacique Guaro) during Ladie's Night at Pacifico, a bar with neon lights, a fog machine and a homemade balance board on a roller that almost made me eat sand. 

We ventured to the other side of town for the best dance party on Friday nights at a place called Crazy Monkey. For the first few hours, a salsa and meringue band plays and the people move their hips smoothly. After a while, a DJ sets up shop and gets the people going with a slightly faster-paced, rasta-style set. Later into the night, the fist-pumping American songs surface and you'd be surprised how quickly the mixture of languages turns to English. It was at the Crazy Monkey that we met and danced with some crazy Canadians, who were nice enough to give us a ride back to the hostel and very loudly serenade us with the Canadian national anthem along the way. 

We attended a small bonfire on the beach and against all internal signs and signals saying, "NO," we waded into the water for a little night swim and our first experience of light-up plankton. That's right, if you move the water around, plankton appear in a bright, yellow-green color and then disappear. It was definitely worth the scare of the dark water. 

The most recent adventure was a full day in the sun. In the morning we had surf lessons with our hostel coworker. It is much harder than it looks but very rewarding when you stand up on the board! I never realized how tough you have to be to take the waves though. We were beaten up, bruised and Niesha came home with a busted lip, but we are absolutely going to try it again! After surfing we headed for the catamaran booze cruise, which, as the name states, was full of booze, Costa Rican food, snorkeling, swimming, and a beautiful sunset cruise back to the bay (pictured left). This is a tour company we suggest to our guests here at the hostel and after experiencing it ourselves, we are full supporters and promoters. 

A few extras: 

1. We found a quite little nook in the loft of a bookstore where we will probably spend quite a bit of time. Jim, the owner, has been here for almost 13 years after leaving his management position at a winery to follow his dream of owning a bookstore in paradise. He is interesting, full of stories, and is more than happy to offer the loft and a cup of joe for our reading pleasures. 

2. I am very tired of hearing "eyyy mami" in the street. It's a hot and humid beach town where 80% of the people here are in some form of a bikini top and shorts. It should not come as a surprise that I am too. Knock it off.