If you are anything like me, your mind looks like an internet window with 2,356 tabs open at once, all the time. I am always thinking about something that needs to be done, someone I need to call, something that needs to be picked up, or sometimes I think about being anywhere other than where I am at the time of the thought. It's like a never ending to-do list and it stresses me out.
I wish I could shut my mind down for 24 hours - just 24 hours. Is that too much to ask? I would even settle with it being shut down for the 5-8 hours of sleep I get at night. That is, if you can call it sleep, when I am constantly waking up worrying about whatever is on my mind. It's not healthy. Not to mention, I get cranky when i'm tired and stressed. No one likes to see my cranky.
The worst part? When all of these things are on my mind, it's hard to focus on just one. (Go figure!) There have been times when I am mid-thought on one topic, my mind jumps to another one and I lose track of where I was in the original thought process.
Now, before I start to sound like I'm losing my mind, I understand there is a level of difficulty that comes with trying to completely free your mind of worries and thoughts, especially when you have legitimate things to worry and think about. Therefore, I have been trying to find ways to at least channel my thoughts and focus on one thing for as long as I feel necessary.
In the off chance there is anyone else out there dealing with something similar (my guess is most women), I am going to share them with you.
1. Write
Multiple studies have been linked to writing things down and better memory. Often times it seems that what is on my mind is something I either don't want to forget, or can't seem to get out of my mind, regardless of how hard I try. The act of writing something down, therefore, frees my mind from keeping it at the forefront of my thoughts because it is recorded elsewhere.
Think of it as mind deception. Even though you may not ever want to read that thought again, you are tricking yourself into thinking you will, at some point, be able to return to that thought, and you no longer need to keep it at the forefront of your mind. If it's something you do want to remember, you have it written down so that's possible without having to remember it in that moment.
Writing also helps focus my mind by challenging me to remain faithful to one topic. When writing about just one topic, all of the thoughts in the forefront of my mind must be related to said topic, therefore keeping me focused.
2. Exercise
"Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't shoot their husbands. They just don't."
Whether it be a walk around the neighborhood or an intense session of cardio kickboxing, exercise helps free and focus my mind. Generally, the slower-paced exercises help focus my mind and the intense workouts help free my mind. When I am in the middle of a kickboxing combination like jab, cross, low kick, high kick, I think about nothing other than mastering the combination to the best of my ability. When I am walking at a nice, slow pace, enjoying the scenery and taking nice, even breaths, my mind slows down with me. I guess this is why I am going to try yoga. Yes - I said it. I am going to try relaxing with yoga. I have always thought of it as something you need extreme patience for, and since I severely lack that virtue, I never mustered up the courage to try it. I have heard it does wonders for the mind though, so it is on my to-do list. (…irony?)
3. Talk to a Friend
As long as you have a friend who is a good listener, this is a must have tool in your mind-focusing box. Talking to friends helps me let off steam, laugh about things I thought I wanted to cry about, gain an outside perspective, hear advice and above all, it comforts me knowing someone is willing to listen. Having someone who is willing to listen to the stresses of your life (and who is willing to share their stresses with you, in hopes of also having someone to listen) is one of the greatest gifts. I call it friend therapy. It's cheaper than clinical therapy and better for your soul. I am lucky enough to have a few absolutely wonderful, therapeutic friends to talk to.
4. Listen to Music and Sing Along
This one is simply awesome because if the music is loud enough, and I throw in some dance moves, I can hardly hear myself think. A slightly less-effective, but fun way to clear my mind.