Just when I think everything is going perfect, life rains on me again. Let's just say broken hearts are not fun and I will leave it at that.
I use to wonder when life would stop testing me. I use to think about that perfect time when I didn't have to worry about little things anymore and my stress acne would forever go away (yeah, right). It wasn't until this broken heart that I realized a few important things. Some of them are still in line for my heart and mind to accept them but I do realize they are true.
Lessons learned from a broken heart...
1. Life will never stop testing me.
As I write this I can't help but smile because I know how ridiculous this sounds to finally be realizing such a thing. I should have known this. In fact, I think I did know this, I just chose to ignore it. The fact of the matter is - life will always test us. It is not the test itself but how we respond that is important. I am generally a happy person and I try to remain optimistic throughout everything in life. I am that glass-half-full, look for the silver lining type girl. Of course no one can be this person all the time but I try to be that person as much as I can. It makes me feel better.
2. I shouldn't ever have to sweat the small things, they are small for a reason.
I am a tiny, micro-dot in the scope of the world. End of story. What that means is, my problems (the small ones) should not carry any significance in my life or anyone else's. Of course I need to express what i'm feeling and deal with issues I am concerned with but the point is to not worry because life is ok and things will get better. To better explain, please refer to this quote that seems to speak right to my heart at the moment: "An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. When life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means it's going to launch you into something great. So just focus, and keep aiming."
3. Broken hearts do heal.
As much as I didn't think this was true a week ago when my heart was initially broken, I feel better today so that, to me, is proof that broken hearts do heal. Even a fraction better is improvement and I don't know whether that is due to understanding lessons 1 and 2 or if broken hearts just heal regardless, but either way I am glad to feel better. This is something I didn't know before because I have never truly had my heart broken, and let me share something with you after having experienced this, I hope it never happens again. Although I am thankful for life leading me the way it is meant to go, I wouldn't voluntarily submit my heart to this kind of pain again. It's different than being kicked when you are down. It's different than some jerk being a jerk and making you cry. This pain comes from deep within your soul and starts from the inside out. The aching is constant, although it can be hidden at times. And when I least expect it, when I think I have put enough chains on the door to the room in which I threw this pain and the memories attached to it, the doors swings open, the pain emerges and tears start flowing. But I promise you, take it from someone who is in the midst of the healing phase as you read this, broken hearts do heal. Because each day it hurts a little less than the day before and whether you agree or not, I believe that is something to smile about.
4. Stress acne will always come back... (this one was hard for me to accept).
Does this really need an explanation? Face wash.. get some. I am generally against violence but in this case I raise a white flag. It's the only way to defend and destroy those little pests.
